Inspired by a friend (he dared me to write a fanfic explaining the nature of Sam's relationship with his pony), I got creative. Instead of giving him a normal fanfic, I gave him an unofficial Very Secret Diary.


The V. Secret Diary of Bill the Pony


Day 1.
Bill Ferny v. annoying. Forgot my hay. Big disturbance down at the inn. Something about hobbit and disappearance and ring. Sure not more important than my hay. Days w/o hay now: 3. Getting v. hungry.

Day 2.
Sold! New owner maybe not forget hay. Apparently worth 12 silver pennies. Go me!
Later.
New owner taking me on journey. Wonder if hay there.

Day 5.
New owner is Sam. V. cute little hobbit. Obviously into other hobbit with blue eyes. Of course, so is everybody else. Sam will kill them if they try anything. Wish Sam were into me.

Day 10.
Big white horse stole blue-eyed hobbit. Maybe now can get Sam’s attention. Sam v. worried about other hobbit. Forgot hay.

Day 12.
Have been in Rivendell since yesterday. Lots of hay, but no Sam. Sam v. busy giving blue-eyed hobbit bath. Indistinguishable backup hobbit came to visit though. V. nice. Maybe give up Sam. Saw Elrond trying on Arwen’s dresses. Purple so not his color.

Day 15.
Leaving Rivendell in morning. Maybe see Sam again. Sorry to leave good hay, though. Maybe Sam will bring with us? Little blue-eyed hobbit v. v. cute now that has had so many baths. Would Sam kill me if tried something? Probably.

Day 17.
V. cold on mountain. Don’t like it. Wish there were other way. Maybe Gap of Rohan? Have heard Rohan has best hay in Middle-earth.

Day 18.
Well, other way. Cannot go through caves though. Must be left behind. Sam going to follow blue-eyed hobbit. Where will get hay now?


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